Washington, D.C. - In a move that turned the political world upside-down, Congress announced today that instead of having a traditional presidential election next November, candidates will compete on the popular reality game show "Survivor", winner take all.

"The 2000 election was an embarrassing joke," said Senator Patrick McGroin, "We've decided to avoid looking like fools again and simply use 'Survivor' to decide the next president."

The show will pit ten candidates against each other in what is traditionally a post-merge situation on the show, where every individual fights for him or her self...